Burial (2022)

Starring Tom Felton: that was enough to raise red flags, but I was willing to give the film a chance — after all, surely a WWII film with werewolves can’t be all bad. Sadly, despite the film premiering at London’s FrightFest, Burial isn’t a horror film at all: the werewolves in question aren’t of the hairy, fanged, supernatural kind, but are instead German resistance fighters (known as Werwolf). This is a war film, and a bloody boring one at that.The film opens as a man breaks into the home of an old woman, a Russian soldier during WWII, looking to learn about her secret wartime mission. The old woman tasers the intruder, handcuffs him to a radiator, drugs him, and recounts her tale about how she was tasked with transporting Hitler’s body back to Stalin in Moscow…Writer/director Ben Parker seems to be under the illusion that he is saying something profound about the nature of evil, directing with all seriousness, despite the hilarity that ensues from the terrible script and even worse performances. Not one of the actors playing Russians attempt an accent: most sound like they’re from London, although I did detect an Irish accent at one point; meanwhile, the Germans are played by Estonians, as if vaguely European would do the trick.The dull as ditchwater WWII scenes see the Russians encountering the Werwolf, who have been ordered to retrieve Hitler’s body; the fighting that ensues is tedious and difficult to follow (especially when you’re fighting the urge to take a nap). Felton plays Lukasz, a Polish man of German heritage who helps the Russians to evade capture, and proves to be an even worse actor than Daniel Radcliffe. Hitler’s dead body gives the best performance.About the only positive thing I can say about Burial is that it guaranteed that the next two films of the day would be more enjoyable.